And then I'm gonna get a cocktail Vodka and Ginger Ale Yeah, I'm gonna smoke a cigarette That's nine miles long I'm gonna kiss that pretty girl On the Tilt a Whirl 'Cause this old man is going to town Then as God as my witness I'm gettin' back into show business I'm gonna open up a nightclub called 'The Tree of Forgiveness' And forgive everybody Ever done me any harm I might even invite a few choice critics Those syphilitic parasitics Buy 'em a pint of Smithwick's And smothert'em with my charm 'Cause then I'm gonna get a cocktail Vodka and Ginger Ale Yeah, I'm gonna smoke a cigarette That's nine miles long I'm gonna kiss that pretty girl On the Tilt a Whirl Yeah this old man is going to town Yeah when I get to heaven I'm gonna take That wristwatch off my arm What are you gonna do with time After you've bought the farm And them I'm gonna go find my Mom and Dad And good old brother Doug Well I bet him and cousin Jackie Are still cuttin' up a rug Wanna see all my mama's sisters 'Cause that's where all the love starts I miss 'em all like crazy Bless their little hearts And I always will remember These words my daddy said He said, "Buddy, when you're dead You're a dead peckerhead" I hope to prove him wrong That is

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